In a city where music couldn't be more important…my journey with the amazing Marching Lions

We all try. We have our successes. We have what we deem as failures at the time, which we (hopefully) later realize were not failures, but just parts of the journey to wherever we are. Yet in the pursuit of success (defined differently for everyone), the fear of failure often keeps us from reaching the success we strive for. I’ll start this blog off with honesty – I’m trying real hard lately to rid myself of this fear of failure completely, but its taking a conscious effort. Right now, my only option is to move forward with all the strength, confidence, grace, and wisdom I can muster, along with visions of only what I WANT to happen, and what WILL happen, and what I will DO to make it happen. I completed the last day of band camp today, and this summer has been strange. In short, in May, I had verbally accepted an offer to teach at my “dream school” (literally – I applied there the past 2 years), and planned to give my resignation to JMS, but hold band camp to leave the music program as strong as possible. It’s July. I finished band camp today. Have a week off. Will be back at JMS on Monday, August 1, for the first day of “professional development”. I couldn’t leave. I declined my dream school offer a few weeks ago. This decision, which I sat on for a month, was possibly one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make. Unfortunately I have had many moments in the past few weeks trying to ward off regret, wondering if I made the biggest mistake of my life. It wasn’t. There’s been a lot of craziness. The head director quit last week. Things were falling apart. But I GOT this. This week, I became the Head Band Director. Of “my baby.” The only reason I stayed at that school. I couldn’t bear to leave, knowing I hadn’t finished the project I started, and that leaving would inevitably lead to the speedy crumbling of the JMS Marching Lions. If you are reading this, I must assume you know about my past year. If not, you’ll get bits and pieces of the story along the way. Or I’ll write a blog about it. Anyway, I had a big goal last year, and I succeeded in many ways, many unexpected ways. It was a challenge. But I had a lot of help. I had a team. I was learning as I went, on how to have a music program, how to hold band practice, how to direct, and get a marching band ready for parades, in NEW ORLEANS of all places. We fought a lot of battles and won. This year, the expectations and hopes are HIGH. The kids, the staff, and even the neighborhood folk who stop to talk to me about the band when they bicycle past the school, when I walk from our “band room” (the old library building, which is also a computer lab). Everyone believes that our team will do it again – me, and the “team.” But essentially, half of my team is gone, and much of the responsibility to keep this thing running will lie upon me. Last year was nuts, but I think I am in for something even bigger this year. Last year we fumbled and miraculously got our shit together. We “brought the music back to New Orleans,” a goal that many said was impossible at the start of the year. But the ultimate goal is not to simply bring it back. I can bring you somewhere and hope you’ll stay and enjoy yourself, but you can get up and leave. The ultimate goal is for the music to STAY and become a powerful source of empowerment and hope in that school, in that neighborhood. This blog will be a continuation of my journey with the Marching Lions. At first I typed in “my” Marching Lions. But they are not MINE, but an entire community’s, which is why they are so important and amazing. Thank you for taking an interest in the happenings of my life. I hope that you will on occasion feel a sense of hope, or restored faith in humanity, or just an emotion of some type, when I tell stories about my amazing students, and the really amazing things that people will do in the name of love. Not like, ”I’m in love” love, but just living and acting through love-based actions, rather than what I seem to be mostly surrounded by…negativity and fear-based actions. Stay tuned for more to come…